USAF Annual Summer Training

Well, I'm back.

I like doing my summer USAF thing. I'm on a small base in a small town and it's nice to get away from the Atlanta mayhem. The traffic doesn't go very fast there and I really don't have time to watch TV or the news. For 3 weeks I was oblivious to what was going on. And when I did hear a snippet of news it sounded very distant and I couldn't have cared less. The base is safe and every afternoon at 5pm they play retreat over the loudspeaker and then the National Anthem. Everybody outside stops....right in their tracks. Even the cars on base stop where they are. You face the flag or music and either salute in uniform or put your hand over your heart. One day I was almost at the gym...and I worked out everyday for 17 days...I can't believe it either.....but there was this mother and her 4 year old son walking on the sidewalk and over the loudspeaker that could be heard for 100 miles...retreat starts. Then the National Anthem. The mother stops, put her hand over her heart and so does her little son. But he also has to go pee pee. So one hand is on his heart while the other hand is taking care of other business and he is doing the pee pee dance. Too bad I don't have a video of that.

It takes me a few days to get back into the Delta swing of things. My suitcase had to be completely put back together to go on a trip. That was hard. I forgot my watch on my first trip back..I've never done that.....instead of driving 85 to work I think the fastest I went was 60....but now I'm on my second trip back and it's all normal...like I never left....until next year.

Sad, A Little Weird and Sweet

I thought I was taping Michael Jackson's funeral or whatever it was. Evidently, Direct TV thought otherwise. I was kind of watching it while it was on live but I was knee deep in this project I'm working on so Michael didn't get my full attention.

The program was really sad.

It made me realize how sad it was for his family. There was his mother saying goodbye to her youngest son. Not good.

The casket was a little weird. First I wouldn't have him there. Like I said, he should be buried way before now. It's just strange. He died at least two weeks ago. And that casket. Polished gold? And on rollers? It looked like a huge thing that they would have at some tacky Chinese all you can eat buffet that was filled with orange chicken. Like a huge chaffing dish. And there wasn't something that they could have put the casket on after they rolled him in? A nice stand or something? I kept thinking, I hope they locked those wheels because if that thing starts rolling....oooops, that's going to be a problem. And with the rollers it also looked like a hospital gurney. And then when someone would finish singing the spotlights would light up that hideous gold box like Michael was going to pop out of it like a birthday cake. All wrong. Very wrong.

The sweet part was his little girl. That was an interesting moment. You don't really think of Michael Jackson as someone's daddy. I wonder when she looks in the mirror and then thinks about her dad....does she wonder, who are all these black people?

Now whoever put this thing together is amazing. How did they do that so fast? It was flawless. Very impressive. Too bad my recorder didn't work.

Michael Jackson

This story is much more fun than Sarah Palin abandoning the chief executive position of the state of Alaska. The job that the voters were counting on her to complete and she ditched them. Nice job Sarah.

Michael on the other hand is really tragic.

He needs to be buried. Dig a hole and put him in it. This whole hysteria over his funeral is absurd. They can take years for all I care to plan the memorial and they can have a memorial every month.....just put him to rest. Keeping him in cold storage is really disrespectful and gross. Respect the dead. He's not a media play toy or something to make money from. That was when he was alive.

And am I supposed to believe that his kids are biologically his? Didn't I learn in school that dark skin and brown eyes are dominant? So he had these kids through artificial restitution and they ended up with blond hair and blue eyes?. Straight blond hair with very white skin? I don't think so.

What's more likely is that he had such a self hatred for himself for being a black man that he changed into a white woman. Well still biologically a man but he would give Diana Ross a run for her money. So if he's going to have kids, he certainly doesn't want any black babies. He wants white babies. Like him. Much easier to start white than to do whatever he did to get white.

And the bio mom possibly wants custody of the kids. No what she wants is money. Another payout. Hey Jacksons.....if want custody of these kids who are not biologically related to you in any way then you better pay out and pay out big.

That's what I think.

I love this Michael Jackson stuff.

Al Sharpton, Superhero

I envision Al Sharpton living in a two or three story house. The house is filled with TV monitors. There is a command post with phones and police scanners. On the top two floors there is a big metal pole like the ones in a fire house that Al can slide down whenever there is a big news moment. At the bottom of the pole is a collection of Al's finest, most hideous clothes, perfectly pressed...ready for the superhero to wear. And of course there is a huge can of hair gel.

When the call comes in....like Michael Jackson dying.....Al and his team leap into action. He slides down the pole, puts his mustard colored superhero outfit on gives a generous slap of the old hair grease and it's out to find the TV cameras. I don't think it was 3 minutes after the 911 call and Al was set up at the Apollo theater doing I don't know what. It was a combination of vigil, circus, speculation and pontificating...all from the Rev Al.

He is a master.

He is everywhere.

He can talk ad nauseam about anything.

He is a Superhero.

Actually, when I see him, I usually have to take about 10 Tums.